one down.
19 20 or more to go.
Archive for death
things i wanna do before i die
like something from A Walk to Remember?
Not really.
1. drive (again, even once or twice)
2. eat strawberries dipped in chocolate
3. see Lifehouse perform live (this is gonna be so expensive)
4. go to Baguio (again), Galera, Cebu (again, loved the wide streets), Boracay, Bohol (to see the Chocolate Hills), New York, California, Seattle, France, Singapore, Hongkong, London, Canada (to see Ces), etc. (yeah, right. i wish.)
5. ride a horse
6. iceskate
7. complete the Harry Potter movie series (2 more)
8. marry again (so i can plan it)
9. see a real castle (and let down my hair from the tower… joke!)
10. see my grandchildren (after my kids finishes school, of course)
11. kiss someone under a mistletoe (and i wrote this before i saw HP kiss Cho, ok?)
12. be matron of honor for Mai’s, Anne’s, and Bes’ wedding. (this is gonna take forever if these 3 won’t hurry up already!)
13. ride an airplane again, and take pictures while inside. forgot to do this the first time.
14. wear contact lenses again, for some occasion… and sunglasses.
15. wear skinny jeans and not feel fat. GO ON A DIET.
16. buy a good SLR, and take great pictures. (again, expensive)
17. finish another course (CERTIFICATE in something will be fine)
18. finish my OJT in PNU (see #17)
19. grow my hair longer than this (as in as long as i can handle it)
20. paint my nails yellow (i’ve done white, green, blue, pink, blackish, tan, purplish)
21. enroll in Instituto Cervantes and learn Spanish.
====================
changed the title, i can’t have just 10, or 12. I realized I have to have a lot. Sorta like my Reasons For Breathing. As long as this list continues, I don’t have a reason to die, to snuff out, to quit, to give up, or whatever synonyms you can think of. Brilliant, huh? *grin*
so now i have 20 21 things… i wonder which one of these i’m gonna do first. Probably the last. Piece of cake!
things i wanna do before i die
like something from A Walk to Remember?
Not really.
1. drive (again, even once or twice)
2. eat strawberries dipped in chocolate
3. catch a snowflake with my tongue
4. go to Baguio (again), Galera, Cebu (again, loved the wide streets), Boracay, Bohol (to see the Chocolate Hills), New York, California, Seattle, France, Singapore, Hongkong, Ireland, London, Canada (to see Ces), etc. (yeah, right. i wish.)
5. ride a horse
6. iceskate
7. complete the Harry Potter movie series (2 more)
8. marry again (so i can plan it)
9. see a real castle (and let down my hair from the tower… joke!)
10. see my grandchildren (after my kids finishes school, of course)
11. kiss someone under a mistletoe (and i wrote this before i saw HP kiss Cho, ok?)
12. be matron of honor (abay lang pwede na) for Anne’s, and Bes’ wedding. (this is gonna take forever if these 2 won’t hurry up already!)
13. ride an airplane again, and take pictures while inside. forgot to do this the first time.
14. wear contact lenses again, for some occasion… and sunglasses.
15. wear skinny jeans and not feel fat. <– did this already, but now…. f*ck. GO ON A DIET!!!
16. buy a good DSLR, and take great pictures.
17. finish another course (CERTIFICATE in something will be fine)
18. finish my OJT in PNU (see #17)
19. grow my hair longer than this (as in as long as i can handle it)
20. paint my nails yellow (i’ve done white, green, blue, pink, blackish, tan, purplish)
21. enroll in Instituto Cervantes and learn Spanish. <–not that good at it, so it's still here
22. finish my M.A. (Early Childhood)
23. find a copy of P.S. I Love You (Barbara Conklin, Sweet Dreams #1 issue); and a book entitled Kaleidoscope (ata). A friend of mine in high school gave me this, but i lost it. This is where I first read “none are so blind as they that won’t see.” And Frank Deford’s Alex: The Life of a Child (it’s abt a child with Cystic Fibrosis)
24. run my own preschool, or tutorial center
25. meet Gerard Butler in person <–ayan, may motivation to live on… LOL
====================
changed the title, i can’t have just 10, or 12. I realized I have to have a lot. Sorta like my Reasons For Breathing. As long as this list continues, I don’t have a reason to die, to snuff out, to quit, to give up, or whatever synonyms you can think of. Brilliant, huh? *grin*
so now i have 20 21 25 things… i wonder which one of these i’m gonna do this year? #2! bili nga kong strawberries sa linggo. weh… hahahaha!
on dying
As i go through my fellow blogmates’ entries this week, i stumbled upon hers. I already know how she writes, and have been enthralled by her excellent style. I knew that her current entry wasn’t about her or her friends and their love stories. I felt something was different.
I have not had the pleasure of meeting Mrs. Neri. I am sure her demise was a great loss to the Cebuanos and all of the people who met her or read her work. From what I have read from other websites, Mrs. Neri was a splendid writer and poet, aside from being pretty and young.
This gave me a sinking thought… all of these people… they wrote beautiful tributes for her. When I die, will there be someone who will take time off to remember, and write something about me? Have I been influential enough? Helpful enough? Strong enough?
Will there be lots of people at my wake, crying and looking at my coffin where i lay so soundly asleep? Will the heavens carefully darken when i finally be laid to rest? Will butterflies flutter about and kiss the shoulders of gloom-stricken fellows surrounding my grave?
After I have had my silence, will my kids be alone in the quest of finding me in the dark? Will their dreams be shattered? Will they hate me for leaving?
These are my questions. These are my fears.
I know of my importance to my friends and family. I, who have mothered three wonderful children. I, who have been a daughter, a sister, and a friend. Though not perfect, I existed.
Death, I fear not. It’s leaving everyone behind that petrifies me.
on dying
As i go through my fellow blogmates’ entries this week, i stumbled upon hers. I already know how she writes, and have been enthralled by her excellent style. I knew that her current entry wasn’t about her or her friends and their love stories. I felt something was different.
I have not had the pleasure of meeting Mrs. Neri. I am sure her demise was a great loss to the Cebuanos and all of the people who met her or read her work. From what I have read from other websites, Mrs. Neri was a splendid writer and poet, aside from being pretty and young.
This gave me a sinking thought… all of these people… they wrote beautiful tributes for her. When I die, will there be someone who will take time off to remember, and write something about me? Have I been influential enough? Helpful enough? Strong enough?
Will there be lots of people at my wake, crying and looking at my coffin where i lay so soundly asleep? Will the heavens carefully darken when i finally be laid to rest? Will butterflies flutter about and kiss the shoulders of gloom-stricken fellows surrounding my grave?
After I have had my silence, will my kids be alone in the quest of finding me in the dark? Will their dreams be shattered? Will they hate me for leaving?
These are my questions. These are my fears.
I know of my importance to my friends and family. I, who have mothered three wonderful children. I, who have been a daughter, a sister, and a friend. Though not perfect, I existed.
Death, I fear not. It’s leaving everyone behind that petrifies me.
mga usap-usapan
Kumain kami noon sa isang Bulaluhan sa Evangelista… si Letku, gusto na agad uminom ng sopdrinks, eh ayaw siyang payagan ni Dada.
“Kumain ka muna.” sabi nito.
Maya-maya…
Dada : Letku, kuha ka ngang tissue.
(di siya pinansin ni Letku… may pairap-irap pa.)
Dada : Cge na, Letku, nasa likod mo lang. Baka magalit si Dada, cge.
(di pa rin siya pinansin ni Letku… halatang pikon na si Dada, pero nasa labas kasi kami, kaya parang di niya makuhang magalit… kaya…)
Dada : Bochog, kumuha ka na nga ng tissue, bilisan mo na, baka ano pa magawa ko.
(lapit ako kay Dada at nakangiting bumulong…)
Ako : Cge nga, ano’ng gagawin mo?
Dada : Eh di, ako na kukuha.
ang tapang, noh?
~oOo~
Kanina, inaasar ko si Bochog habang nagbabasa siya ng libro. Kinikiliti ko, kinakagat, at siyempre, kinukurot.
Pagkatapos ng kulitan, naging seryoso ako at tinanong si Bochog:
“Pano kung namatay na ko, tapos, nagpakita ako sa iyo dito sa kwarto, nakaputi… ano’ng gagawin mo? kakausapin mo ba ko?”
Bochog : Oo.
(Waw… ang tapang ng anak ko.)
Ako : Ano’ng sasabihin mo sa kin?
(iniisip ko na maglilitanya siya ng mga magagandang salita at iiyak… pero…)
Bochog : Nag-Tide ka?
Lagot sa ‘kin ‘to ‘pag nagkataon.
~oOo~
At eto naman daw ang nakalagay sa dyaryo pag namatay na ako:
 |
| ‘What will your obituary say?’ at QuizGalaxy.com |
at eto naman sa lapida ko:
|
mga usap-usapan
Kumain kami noon sa isang Bulaluhan sa Evangelista… si Letku, gusto na agad uminom ng sopdrinks, eh ayaw siyang payagan ni Dada.
“Kumain ka muna.” sabi nito.
Maya-maya…
Dada : Letku, kuha ka ngang tissue.
(di siya pinansin ni Letku… may pairap-irap pa.)
Dada : Cge na, Letku, nasa likod mo lang. Baka magalit si Dada, cge.
(di pa rin siya pinansin ni Letku… halatang pikon na si Dada, pero nasa labas kasi kami, kaya parang di niya makuhang magalit… kaya…)
Dada : Bochog, kumuha ka na nga ng tissue, bilisan mo na, baka ano pa magawa ko.
(lapit ako kay Dada at nakangiting bumulong…)
Ako : Cge nga, ano’ng gagawin mo?
Dada : Eh di, ako na kukuha.
ang tapang, noh?
~oOo~
Kanina, inaasar ko si Bochog habang nagbabasa siya ng libro. Kinikiliti ko, kinakagat, at siyempre, kinukurot.
Pagkatapos ng kulitan, naging seryoso ako at tinanong si Bochog:
“Pano kung namatay na ko, tapos, nagpakita ako sa iyo dito sa kwarto, nakaputi… ano’ng gagawin mo? kakausapin mo ba ko?”
Bochog : Oo.
(Waw… ang tapang ng anak ko.)
Ako : Ano’ng sasabihin mo sa kin?
(iniisip ko na maglilitanya siya ng mga magagandang salita at iiyak… pero…)
Bochog : Nag-Tide ka?
Lagot sa ‘kin ‘to ‘pag nagkataon.
~oOo~
At eto naman daw ang nakalagay sa dyaryo pag namatay na ako:
|
| ‘What will your obituary say?’ at QuizGalaxy.com |
at eto naman sa lapida ko:
|
|
mga huling habilin
naisip ko lang… di natin hawak ang buhay natin… pwedeng isang araw, di na tayo magising… bangungutin tayo, di ba? wala lang, gusto ko lang maging handa…
1. kung naghihingalo pa lang ako, yung mga tipong braindead na… nakaasa na lang sa makina, pwede niyo na akong i-unplug. ayokong maghirap, please…
pag natuluyan ako…
1. ayoko ng malungkot. gusto ko masaya mga tao. kasi i assure you, masaya ako. ang ngumawa, dadalawin ko, sige. sana pagusapan niyo na lang mga masasayang araw ko.
2. ayoko ng mahabang lamay. wag ng umuwi ang mga nasa Tate. Well, di ko naman kayo mapipigilan, pero wala rin naman kayong magagawa pag patay na ko… sayang lang sa pamasahe… pagdasal niyo na lang na mapunta ako sa langit.
3. ayoko ng open casket. gusto ko may picture lang ako sa ibabaw ng kabaong. pili niyo ko ng pinakacute kong picture.
4. ayoko ng ivi-video o kukunan pa ng picture pag patay na ko.
5. gusto ko may powerpoint presentation ng mga pictures ko, pamilya, at prens… ang kanta, pwedeng Beside You ng Simply Red. kaso lang, malungkot yun eh… pero, sige, gusto ko yun eh. pero pagkatapos niyong maiyak, tama na ha.
6. ayoko ng naka-itim mga tao… puti? pwede rin… pink na lang o kaya light blue…
7. ayokong uodin! (tama ba?) cremation na lang… mas mura pa. kung pwedeng isaboy ang abo ko sa Caleruega, kasabay ng paglubog ng araw at paglipad ng mga paro-paro, mas maganda… dramatic di ba? I will fly and be free… if you’re sad, just think of me. pero kahit ano na nga lang na gusto ng mommy ko…
8. ayokong damitan ako ng pangburol… yung tipong parang puff sleeves and all? ampanget… gusto ko simple lang. pwedeng nakapants na lang… di ako sanay ng dress eh. tutal, closed casket naman.
9. gusto ko, papakain niyo sa tao, lahat ng pinagbawal sa king kainin.. matamis, maalat, meaty… bwahahaha… tsaka ayoko ng cheap food ha… yung mga tipong di mo kakainin pag ikaw pumunta ng patay… wag mawawala ang Boy Bawang tsaka beer.
10. ayoko ng pampatay na bulaklak.. hmmm.. mas maganda kung… in lieu of flowers, gusto ko, magdonate sila ng bato sa National Kidney at Transplant Institute, merong donor card na pwedeng kunin dun… o kaya, CASH!!! for my kids. hehe.
11. wala akong ari-arian… wala akong maiiwan kahit kanino kundi utang… at iniiwan ko to sa asawa ko… bwahahaha! bayaran mo lahat yun, pakshet.
12. sana, pag wala na ko, magkasama na ulit mga magulang ko sa iisang lugar.. kung sa Tate, eh di dun, kung dito, eh di dito… tsaka gusto ko, lumipat na silang bahay… benta na nila tong bahay namin..
13. yung mga gamit ko, pamigay nila or itapon… ayoko ng may naaalala pa sila sa kin. basta yung celfone ko, kay Anea.
14. si Dale, Anton at Anea… wag niyong pababayaan… pagpatuloy niyo ang pagtulong niyo sa mga anak ko ha… lalo na kay Dale.. alam niyo naman na special siya… ang mang-api sa mga anak ko, habambuhay kong mumultuhin.
15. wala na akong maisip… pag meron pa, magpo-post ulit ako… hehe.
